“Surviving the empty nest is like crossing the monkey bars. Eventually you have to let go in order to move on.” Laurie Yogi
As a mom I wanted to be sure that I had prepared my children to live independently and make decisions for themselves. But, selfishly I still wanted, needed and insisted on being involved in every aspect of their lives. How could they ever grow if I never let them go?
My husband, on the other hand, was eager for them to leave. And had, in fact, been preparing them and himself for the exodus. “No one over the age of 19 years, 364 days will be permanent residents in this house” were his exact words. I heard it but paid it no mind. BIG MISTAKE!
Nothing prepares you for what you don’t prepare for. And letting my children go was one of the most difficult things I have ever done as a parent. I was not prepared. I had never imagined my life outside of being “needed”. I was there for them 24/7, including holidays and weekends.
If I could tell the truth, I was pretty good at catering to them but not to myself. Being their mother was my life. My lack of preparation allowed me to wonder into moments of sadness and I would find myself in tears because I missed them. Or did I?
It took me a while, but I finally realized that what I missed most about having the kids in the house was the rhythm of parenting. So, to overcome that void, I flipped the record over and began playing – “MY LIFE”.
I now had the time and the tools to LIVE my own life and embrace my new role as their mother. I made some “thyme” for myself and launched my own business.
MakeSomeThyme is my second act.
Thyme stands for time, health, yourself, meals and encourage. I use this platform to encourage others to eat right, cook at home and make their health a priority.
My advice to moms that are approaching the next chapter in parenting is to prepare them and prepare yourself. Know why, when and how they are going to exit and be supportive.
I’m going to need lots of help with this when the day comes.
Had I known then, what I know now it would not have been "as" hard. As with anything if we fail to plan, we plan to fail. The good news is there is still time and each story will be different. Keep smiling.
My friend, even though it was not easy, I am proud of you! It is so easy to get sucked into the pit of hurt feelings because your children's new found freedom of life has become their number one priority as they discover and figure it out and as you become their secondary! It is so easy to become offended but how we forget that we once traveled down that same road and I am sure our parents felt the same way! Just know as life comes around full circle, this season is not forever... and their loves has not changed.... Everyone MUST make some THYME for YOURSELF and make YOU your Priority... Both parents and "grown" children <3
Such words of wisdom my friend. Thank you for the encouragement.